the sacred secular

first of all, what is the meaning of the word “ritual”?

According to Oxford Languages, the definition of ritual is “a religious or solemn ceremony consisting of a series of actions performed according to a prescribed order.”

Similar to the word sacred, the definition of ritual alludes to religion first and foremost, because that has historically been the main source of the idea. But reclaiming ritual is to take note that the word “solemn” is also presented as an alternative classification. When I looked up the word solemn, I loved its definition: “characterized by deep sincerity“

5 ritual ideas to honor a death without religion

Here are 5 ideas to help you think lovingly and creatively about what a beautiful version of honoring a death could look like:

1. create and share a musical soundtrack of a person’s life
   what were their 10 favorite songs? is there a song or two from each chapter of their life (childhood, teen years, young adult, etc.)? you could create the soundtrack using a streaming service and play it at the reception and offer a QR code for attendees to access the playlist.
   
2. ask for donations to a cause they loved
   if there was a cause this person cared deeply about, asking for donations in their memory to that cause is a beautiful way to honor a legacy. you could even have folks who were interested sign up to be reminded to make a small donation on each anniversary of their death as a memorial offering.
   
3. ask for individuals to wear something specific for the ceremony
   was there a particular article of clothing or clothing style that was important to this person? people will often wear black to a memorial service if they aren’t instructed to wear anything in particular. would the deceased person enjoy bright colors, hats, or some other tribute to their lives?
   
4. create a memorial scrapbook of collective photos and memories
   you can reach out to anyone who loved this person and ask for one photo of them with the person along with a written memory, then combine those into a memory scrapbook of their life. you could do this with a physical scrapbook, or use an online photo book tool.
   
5. light a candle with a few beloveds and share stories
   sometimes you may not have influence over what someone’s funeral or memorial is like. regardless, you can gather with a few like-minded beloveds and light a candle with a picture of your lost loved one and share stories and memories together.